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Nanny Screening

Teenage Fashion Has Arrived in Our House

As my son is becoming more of a teenager, his sense of fashion is changing. It's been a long time coming, but now it's arrived, should I be worried?



Help, alarming teenage fashion has entered my house! 

Until recently, my 13 and a half-year-old was pretty relaxed about what he wore. He had a good eye for fashion but wasn't really that bothered about dressing to impress. In fact, he used to laugh at those poor unfortunate souls whose attempts to look cool would leave them looking anything but.

A good example was on a recent shopping trip with his friend, when he claims to have witnessed one of those, in his words, "jean-waddlers" (I'm sure you know what he means), who, due to his gravity-defying garment of choice impinging his natural stride, tripped and fell forwards causing the jeans to fall down completely, thus revealing an unsightly expanse of grey underpants clinging on for dear life over an unfortunately large posterior.

My son and his friend watched with amusement as, red-faced and flustered, the poor young fashion victim attempted to regain his composure whilst scrambling back onto his feet, yanking up the baggy, belted apparel and continued, amidst his group of sniggering friends, on his journey round the mall.

Punk-meets-emo style 

Luckily, American prison wear hasn't been a problem in our house. I say luckily, but to be honest I'm not sure punk-meets-emo is much of a consolation.

It all started quite surreptitiously, with a black skull logoed t-shirt making it's ghoulish appearance, but things have accelerated quite quickly since then, with these items creeping into my boy's wardrobe:

  • Faux leather biker jacket
  • Studded wristband
  • Zombie apocalypse t-shirt
  • Black and tartan bondage trousers
  • A can of bright red hair spray

Hmm. And it doesn't stop with clothing. In addition, we have point blank refusal to visit the hairdresser, and the one that causes the most arguments - hoods that must be worn in public. Not on my watch, but what he does with his clothes/face when out with his mates I can't possibly dictate.

Where has it gone wrong?

Where will it all end? Tattoos? Piercings? Oh dear. He used to look so cute when I was in charge of his wardrobe. Where has it all gone wrong?

There was only one thing left to do. As on countless occasions, I've had to delve deep into the mists of time and draw upon my own teenage experiences. This pathetic pre-emptive strike has not been pretty, nor has it been easy going back that far. I've had to revisit my 16 year old self and trawl through her dodgy 80's wardrobe. Here's what I found:

  • Two studded belts, one black one white
  • Red mini skirt adorned with three fake zips
  • Black faux leather mini skirt
  • Denim snakeskin print mini skirt (I clearly liked mini skirts)
  • Pink "Frankie says" cropped vest top
  • A can of bright red hairspray

My findings? I think I'll just let him experiment.

Jayne, Working Mum and Freelance Editor 

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