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The Perils of Juicing

I love a new fad, especially when it comes to diets. I've tried them all with varying degrees of failure. Most recently I've been dabbling with a juice diet - it's been expensive, messy, and not so great for my teeth!

07/05/2014

 

My penchant for fad diets is nothing new. I once suffered 2 weeks of the cabbage soup diet. By the end I smelt like a school kitchen and only lost half a pound. So when everyone started extoling the virtues of a juice diet I jumped on the bandwagon.

The fact that I didn't have a juicer was not going to stop me. I invested in a state of the art machine which takes up half of my kitchen and terrifies the cats whenever I start it up. Do they all sound like cement mixers?

Trying the juice diet

Start with expensive juicing ingredients

I researched the best recipes, and put together a weekly juice planner. Then I went shopping for my ingredients.

That's when I realised why the juice diet is favoured by celebrities. Because they're the only ones that can afford it!

Having loaded up my shopping cart with half of the fruit and veg aisles, I should have realised that it wasn't going to be cheap. It was the length of the till receipt that really gave it away - it must have been about 6 feet long.

You would think then that this shop would last you for weeks. But oh no...

Let's take Kale as an example. I bought huge bags of the stuff. I crammed it down the juicer, which seemed to make even more noise in protest. And out came... a thimble full of green slush. That was it. An entire mega bag of kale produced enough juice for a mouse.

The mess that juicing causes

I also wasn't quite prepared for the mess. The machine itself is made up of so many parts and each has to be disassembled, scraped, soaked, scrubbed and reassembled.

The pulp itself takes up half my bin space. And I haven't quite worked out how to juice apples and oranges without getting the walls and ceilings splattered. So add to the already mounting cost a new paint job on your kitchen.

Feeling virtuous with my juice diet

Despite all of this, the delicious juice that does eventually emerge makes the whole thing worthwhile. As does that virtuous feeling as you walk into your office, armed with your green and orange concoctions, which you sip away at all day, whilst your colleagues chow down on cakes, biscuits and chocolates.

A visit to the dentist, and the end of my juicing

That virtuous feeling came crashing down recently, however, after a visit to my dentist. When she asked me if I had any problems with my teeth, I said that I was experiencing quite a lot of sensitivity which I'd never had before.

"Have you started juicing recently?" she immediately asked. "Yes" I said. "It's great isn't it?", "No it's not" came the reply. "Stop now" she said.

Apparently juice dieting causes the enamel on your teeth to be constantly eroded. Some acids in juices are more erosive than battery acid. They don't tell you that in the small print.

So now not only am I broke, but also I'm in danger of losing my teeth. Another successful diet then! Hopefully that means I've learnt my lesson.

But as I cram my juicer back into its box and count the cost of this latest fad, my eyes fall upon an article about the Breatharian Diet which involves swapping food for air (!).

Now that sounds like a great idea, that even my bank balance will like...

Amanda Coxen, Working Mum and Tinies Director

 
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